“Well, have you prayed about it?” my mother asks as she gently rubs her thumb over my eyebrow. My long blonde hair rests in little nests on the pillows on my parents’ bed as I lay on my back staring intently at the ceiling. With the utterance of her question, I feel my teenage eyes start to roll and I can hear my frustration sizzle against the cool blue sheets. “Why do you always say that?” I snap. “That doesn’t help me at all. I don’t know what to do and now you’re just telling me to pray!?” I can feel the words sting my lips as they leave my mouth and instantly I regret the force, and tone, which with I said them. My mother, loving and more understanding than I knew at the time, replies with a sigh “Because Amber, sometimes that’s all I know how to do. Sometimes, I don’t know what to do at all, so I just pray about it. And that’s something you have to learn how to do too.”
While my mother’s repetitious advice once elicited in me groans of teenage irritation, I now treasure it and hold it near to my heart in gratitude, like a family heirloom, passed down with care. And like an heirloom, I grow to appreciate it more fully as time goes on. In fact, as I was preparing to write this week’s blogpost, I was having the hardest time trying to figure out how I’d tie together two celebrations in the church this week: Pentecost (May 23rd, 2021) and the Memorial of the Blessed Virgin Mary, Mother of the Church (May 24th, 2021). Both the Holy Spirit and the Blessed Mother hold such a special place in my heart; I couldn’t pick between the two! Only when I sat down, prayed about it (thanks Mom) and did some good research (again, thanks Mom), did I realize the connections between Mary, Pentecost, and my own mother’s quest to teach her children how to cultivate a deep prayer life.
The celebration of the Memorial of the Blessed Virgin Mary, Mother of the Church is a new feast day, inserted into the Roman Calendar in 2018. Although this obligation of this celebration is new, the Church’s devotion to Mary as Mother of the Church is long standing. And from her “Fiat” before Jesus was born to her elevation as mother of all mankind in the utterance of Jesus’ “Woman, behold, your son!” as she stood at the foot of the cross before He took his last breath, Mary has been for us an example of motherly love, trust, and faithfulness. By her very nature as a divine and honorable intercessor, Mary urges us to join her in a deep and fulfilling prayer life – guiding us in her motherly way.
In Acts 1:14 we hear about Mary praying with the Apostles in the Upper Room. They had just witnessed the Ascension and were now waiting to be “baptized with the Holy Spirit” as Jesus had promised just a few verses earlier in Acts 1:5. Until this year, I had never picked up on the fact that Mary prayed with the Apostles while they awaited Pentecost. I wonder if the apostles looked to Mary, the mother Jesus gave to them, for comfort, perhaps even asking “What should we do?” and I wonder if she said “just pray about it” and so they did. Obviously, the Bible doesn’t give me any verses to confirm whether or not Mary told them to pray, but Mary’s declaration as Mother of the Church and her example of divine intercession leads me to believe that she likely could have – or at the very least led by example, praying as she waited with them.
Fast forward 2021 years later and I realize that sometimes, I find myself waiting for my own “Pentecost.” I find myself saying “Come Holy Spirit,” wanting so deeply to be filled with the spirit. I’ve been lucky to have felt the Holy Spirit several times in my life and I find myself pining for that sensation of all-enveloping love – the kind that gave goosebumps at my Confirmation mass or causes the tears to flow at weekend retreats. But, when the strong driving winds and tongues of fire don’t come, and my cheeks are dry and arms goosebump-free, I feel disappointed and dry. Knowing this, then what a beautiful gift of Easter, on the final day of the Easter season no less, to have my eyes opened to the comfort that Mary knows exactly what it’s like to wait for the decent of the Holy Spirit!
As we step forward into Ordinary Time in the Church calendar, I know that the feeling of dryness, of waiting in the “Upper Room” of my heart will surely come, it always does sometime between Easter and Advent. When I find myself wondering “will the Spirit truly come?” I’ll take my mother’s advice and “just pray about it” knowing Mary, the Mother of the Church, is praying for me, right by my side. And goosebumps or not, tears or no tears, I’ll say “Come Holy Spirit” and “Mary, Mother of the Church, pray for us.”
Note from the Author: This blog post was originally written for Women at the Well and was published on their blog in May of 2021. Women at the Well is a nonprofit organization dedicated to supporting and empowering Catholic women to grow in Faith + Community. Women at the Well has been such a blessing in my life. Check them out at Women at the Well to find out how you can bring Women at Well to your parish!
